Saturday 19 June 2010

You want kartofel fries with that?

I popped in to McDonalds for a take away coffee this afternoon, I was meeting someone off the train and had a half hour spare. Maccy D's is somewhere I normally avoid like the clap, a terrible, terrible concept, but with nice toilets. While waiting for my brew I witnessed a clash of cultures.

Your average Ukrainian has the patience of a two year old on Red Bull, unless youre off when the lights go to green like Lewis Hamilton fighting for the championship the guy behind will be on the horn quicker than you can say "dasvedanya". Stand in any queue and the person behind will be pushing you in a way that would be taken as sexual harassment anywhere else in the world.

I know a lot of Ukrainian friends and colleagues read this stuff and I know they won’t get offended because they know it’s true!

In Ronalds restaurant you literally had an army of burger flippers and the brain dead throwing what passes for food out at the punters at a rate of knots unprecedented outside Ukraine. It truly was impressive to see. But it wasn’t fast enough! “What do you mean I have to wait thirty seconds for six big macs and coke, can’t you do it quicker?”, the level of intensity was actually frightening.

The fastest food I have ever seen but it still wasn’t fast enough.